“Once, we were to celebrate Vinayaka Caturti… We had bought a clay Ganesha for the function. The night before the festival, I was fast asleep… And I suddenly felt a wonderful sensation… Someone was patting me on my head, as I slept.” she said, running the palm of her hand softly from her top of her forehead, backward along the crown…”And I woke up with a start…And what do I see? A small sized Ganesha! He was patting me with his trunk…
Another time… It was the first friday in the month of Adi, a day special to Goddess… Early morning, some ladies came home, gave me traditional offering of Coconut and tamboolam… I have not seen them before… This repeated the next two Fridays as well…The fourth Friday, some ladies came, and gave me a cup of milk… And then on the last Friday of the month, a majestic lady came home. She was wearing a brilliant red silk saree, with large border… She looked glorious, ajaanubahoo (tall, and with long arms)… She had long hair, with lots of flowers.” (Pankajamma mentioned a particular flower species, but I forget which…)…
“I was so overwhelmed by her presence that I rushed to her and hugged her, saying ‘Amma!’.
I didn’t know who she was. Later I mentioned this to Sri Kunjuswami, who was staying with us those days. After listening to the description he told me that the lady was none other than Goddess Meenakshi!
I have never gone seeking for these experiences, never entertained any such desire. But they just happened.
After I came to Bhagavan, I suddenly started composing songs on Bhagavan. What do I know of these! I am but a fourth standard pass. But the words and the tune would just occur to me. I have no knowledge of classical music. I have no idea of raga or metre. But the tune and the name of the raga would occur to me. And so would the Taala (metre). More than a hundred such songs in Tamizh have been noted by me. Songs on Bhagavan! But sometime after 2000 AD, the songs stopped coming. I never went after them in the first place. Now that they don’t come, that’s fine too…”
She has been through some severe bouts of physical sufferings due to illnesses, in different times in her life.
“I know that these sufferings are but Karma being erased. This I know that this birth is the last one. All Karma will go by the grace of Bhagavan”, she said, with complete faith and confidence.
On our request, she sang the last song that had “come to her”. She was not keeping well and was also suffering from sore throat. But she didn’t hesitate to sing. After singing she excused herself saying, “Old age affects the body…Can’t help that…But what does that have to with real? Adu vEra AaLu (that Person is different)” she said tapping her spiritual heart (on the right side of the chest).
These were the kind of conversations that Pankajamma, the simple old lady, shared with us, on the eve of her 87th birthday. Her son and his family stay with her. There was a kid running in and out. It was a normal Indian family….Except for this lady called Pankajamma!
Tags: Ramana Maharshi